Hot Geysers and Spewing words

What a relaxing day, no usually my forte to sit around doing nothing but my planned trip to hit Golf balls was canceled due to lack of interest and or energy! I framed ,actually Terria did it my new Bronx Tale Poster in the TV room, thanks again for Terria for buying and installing it for me, I just had to hang it on the wall and it is all done and looks great. As for the evening don't really know whats in store , might watch Despicable Me on pay per view  tonight, or watch the old Fuck head Favre on MNF, who knows?? Had a long 5 days off from work fro Thursday through today so I'm actually kind of excited to get back to work and keep myself occupied with 9 hours of something, albeit not much at least t accounts for my day and I don't have to wonder what I'm going to do, the gym at lunchtime and sometimes after work and then home for dinner and the routine goes on! It is a routine but I feel like I am gettng into that rut and might start to shake it up a bit try to deviate a little throughout the week. I'm really happy about Home and work and everything sees to be falling into place for me ad Terria. So much work has been put into each other and to the kids and finally there is a little daylight before the next dawn of life's experiences and before Braz and Nikki go to Afghanistan in April. With this o Terria ad my mind we only hope that things go well and that our kids come back ok and don't really see t many life changing things occur in front of them, War is truly Hell but we hope for the best in a bad situation nevertheless. The knees are feeling better  and the left knee seems to have stagnated in the healing process, so much better than it was a few weeks back but not getting better progressively as I had hoped. Visit the Dr. next Monday and hope he can give me a shot on this knee and make it better instantly. I assume there will Arthroscopy in te future but this will buy me 6 months to a year before having it done but I am glad it is not blown ut as I originally had feared that it was . This month will bring about a crossroads to a new Holiday season one which we look forward t with apprehension and doubts, the families are split for whatever reasons, we will do Aprils for T-giving and Christmas I assume but if not Terria and I will get away t a pro game in AZ or Seattle to enjoy the Holidays together. Seems like so long ago when the thoughts of Christmas and spending time together were of Danger f occurring way back when. But Shit happens and I'm over it all , I don't truly know if Terria is and rightly so If not, the growth that we have seen from June on has been mind boggling, to think a momentary lapse in good judgement and actions almos created a whirlwind for so many folks, but as I said I am over all of that and am Truly fixated on understanding the phsychoanalytical side of Gregory Anthony, knowing full well I have progressed in so many areas and have also wanted to unlock so many other doors to my past and current ways of doing things. I do think too much, and deeply, but it's al that I know and al that I am to not dumb it all down and allow myself to say "whatever this , or fuck that" I have to take myself more seriously and truly have to fight the fight, my curiosities will never go untouched, i always have to peek behind the next door and see what is there and if it involves me , even moreso . I've learned so much about my selfish , take no prisoners attitude and nature that it at times annoys me and even frightens me to know tha I can inflict so much hurt and pain on other be it emotionally and or physically if need be but always seem to fight the god versus evil battle in picking my war zones and battles in life. As Frank Schaeffer says, Living under the Golden rule is a precious commodity to keep yourself in tuned with others and yourself is key. It's truly very easy to treat others the way you want to be treated, that's easy.  Never assume you know as much as you need to know, self exploration and knowledge of self is so important, but knowing that we can never change nor try to change their perceptions or views even if they differ from our own, its not our place i this lifetime to be the omniscient ones and solve the worlds problems, I was that guy and needed to stop fixing the world and fix myself! So here is now and that's what I have sought to do with myself, and to make everyday a better place to be and the anticipation of better tomorrows a common thought process. The laws of reality and the worlds of positivity can co-exist hand in hand, the gift of this complex mind and the incredible gifts of great family and friends and having a loving and kind heart make everyday a stepping stone to a better world and place to be. I feel so good and positive that everything is lined up properly, this is where the old Greg Would Self Sabotage himself and try to upset the applecart and get back to a place that he knew needed fixing, not anymore, i have really put my heart and soul in listening and being more adept at sitting back and not being the fix all guy, my hands are full with fixing me and the work s never done. I liken my personality to that of an alcoholic, always trouble around the next corner, another drink, another pretty woman away from doing something that I know to be wrong but there is that trigger inside that makes me want to g back into "The Grab Bag of Badness" and repeat my old mistakes with tried and true self sabotaging methods. I cannot fix the world, the world did not ask for my help, i need to calm my world and that's all that really matters anymore. Life is precious ad living it as if it is our last day is so damn important, treasure the Little things and treat people with love and respect ,it always comes back and allows you to sleep better at night and go to sleep with the ear to ear smiles where ever you are at a given time and place. We are all human, we do stupid shit, we learn , we grow, we live better fulfilled lives as a result. God Bless Everybody as the smiles keep bursting ever present and wide!