My AWESOME PLATEFUL of Goodness

The days are slow and getting longer here at work but a job is a job I'd say, especially in todays economic times. Really have very little to share or anything new to bring but will try to write a bit and get me away from Facebook for awhile, Goddamn what a shit hole that place is anymore, my list of 30 friends will soon dwindle to 25 soon and eventually 20 is my magic number for least amount of drama and be able to navigate the site for I originally intended to use it for, networking and shooting the shit with my true friends! So today we celebrate another potluck birthday for co-workers, I'm generally not a participant and go to the gym, but we shall see today and didn't bring anything but figure i bring enough homemade goods throughout the year i should get a free pass on the deal. I will decide here in about an hour as to whether i do the gym here at work or go after work to Ballys. We have another counseling session with Michael tonight and hope to get through it nicely with some progress, but really don't know what else there is to do or talk about, since we've been going mid June we have had 8-9 sessions and have uncovered many good things to work on for me, the night also brings about a coworker that i referred to Michael and he will actually go in before us and leave when we head in. Terria and I enjoyed a great evening out for dinner celebrating her first day back in the classroom with kids, she was able to unwind a bit and met April and Virgina and had Brandon with us and truly had a fun night. Things are settling down with Braz and Nikki in Hawaii and Ty getting ready for his Senior year of Football at Camarillo high , should be fun to watch. Terria and I are moving along in the healing process of a few months back , i have finally stopped killing myself over what i did to her and through therapy has enabled me to see beneath and beyond where i was in my vulnerable time to venture off with another , when what i had was and still is so damn incredible perfect for me. But never taking the easy road i stumbled , bumbled and fell and have recovered well in making my resurgence back to Terria a prosperous one and filled with the true love and admiration and openness that relationship needs. i have made some new friends and have spent some time with my new friends and shared Terria with them , she fits in like a well made glove and they all love her to death. i guess meeting the man that gives so many a hard time and then to meet the incredible woman who is always coined as Awesome , and correlate why do you put up with Greg's shit? She always replies that Greg is not the person he wants everybody to think he is, he is a calm , gentle ,loving and caring human being with a huge heart and she says a Great husband and a good person to have in her corner. i am honored to share her with my world, for she is my world and my boys and brother and sisters are my world! The fact that my God has allowed me more than enough second chances to do things right is amazing to me, i only hope that i can repay the deed with my love and kindness to others and have even opened my heart up to somebody i once hated , but try to be the bigger person and allow the giving and compassion to come out . I must understand that not many have the life that i do, the job, the family ,the Friends and support system that is so incredible, to come home to my wife each day , or meet her at the gym after work is a pleasure and a shared experience that I cannot put a price on. The support and overall wanting to hod and be with my wife and family has only grown in the past 3 months and my experience of delusions has made me a better person in every aspect, gone are the days of sadness and guilt and knowing that I have built an empire brick by brick with my Terria makes it so much more rewarding. The day may be slow but this mind races ahead and hopes to be with and hold onto that warmth and love that i almost lost and almost let go for sheer stupidity! but I've grown and now know that what I am is a good man who makes mistakes and can learn and live a better life through overcoming the many obstacles that we hurdled. I am in fact worthy of all that vi have and am now understanding that fact every single day. Thanks to God for blessing me with the new found faith to cherish and abolish all of the negativity in my life that was tearing a good man down. I move along to my next journey in life which still has me fighting the motorcycle bug and it kills me to this day to not be able to ride a bike, my leathers are waiting , my helmet and gloves gleam at me and my God tells me what i should do, but that fear instilled in my Terrias eyes wont allow me to pull the trigger , i want to, i need to but that fear of riding off and hurting my Honey still shakes my soul, she even says its ok but i don't know if she means that or loves me too much to say no to me!!! I love my life and i love this new world that has opened up to me. God has blessed me with so much incredible goodness it doesn't always seem fair