More Superbike Pageantry

Another look at the world of Superbike racing, Video taping it with my Blackberry seems to slow it down a bit but trust me the speeds and effort required to steer and turn a Superbike at this level is beyond anything anybody has ever tried to do.Amazingly fit riders train like real athletes because they are and have to be lean and strong to manhandle the beasts called the modern day Superbike! We had a great trip and the racing of Superbikes was amazing to watch!

Back Home

Back home from our amazing weekend in Utah, Terria and I arrived home at 3 am tired and worn out from the high altitudes and eating poorly. Now back to the grind of being home, taking a day off with Terria today and hitting the gym here in a few minutes, might also go for a ride around the lake to get my Riding legs back. We were able to workout at the Hotel gym twice which was really nice to do,even met the children of the Corn and an older dude we called the Town cryer, he had turrets so I give the dude some slack but the people of Salt Lake City are very sterile and not as friendly as I thought they would be, but here I show up to their city all badass and laughing at everything, to include their funky customs and kids, not to mention the aforementioned town cryer dude and the rude people at the breakfast bar in the mornings...yeah They were not prepared for the Saurus but I was prepared for them... Good Damn Times! Thanks wonderful Terria for being such a great companion and totally into the scene at the races. Looking soooo!! forward to Chicago and Detroit and all the little stops in between. So much love and admiration for you my Dear!!!

Speed of Racing

Some really unique and technical aspects of professional motorcycle racing. Her we have the top speed of the straight aways and then the tight and technical aspect of bending a bike over and getting it to turn .straihtawa speeds 196 mph , speeds into turns 80 mph! So hard to get right, so bad when it all goes wrong.What a great weekendTerria and I shared together with our passion for each other and our love for Motorcycle racing!

The Great Salt Lake!

What an impressive sight of such a large body of water and yet so shallow at only 15 feet at it's deepest point. Spanning 70 miles long and nearly 40 miles wide the great lake in Salt Lake City is an awesome sight to see. Finished up with race day #2 and withstood 48 degrees cold rain and wind, wind chills took it into the high 30's and that was way too cold. Tomorrow it is supposed to be a bit warmer and hopefully clear of rain so we can enjoy our last day in SLC before heading homeward bound after the last race about 5:15 tomorrow night. We are back inside the Hotel room warm and safe from the elements outside. Thanks to Terria we were able to do a little sight seeing last night and today through some rustic old towns and parts of the very beautiful Salt Lake City areas. THw university of Utah and the Capital building are both perched high upon the hill and make for interesting traversing. The streets of the city are mostly one way streeets and all numbered in the 100's and west and south, north and East, so different than what we are used to seeing. Another very good day and although cold, made the snuggling and staying warm all the more fun... Damn Good Times!!!!

Day One At Races!

This is the nicest most well organized race facility in the country, Miller motor sports park is an incredible facility. Only 5 years old it looks and smells new and is kept in amazing condition,all the way from the bathrooms to the concession stands. Good times, two more days  of fun and racing with my incredible Terria by my side. Hoping that the weather cooperates and can't wait to get home to watch the Tivo version of the races we just saw! Tonight is either Sushi or something eclectic for dinner with a wide range menu. More pictures of the incredible Salt Lake when I can stop on the way to the races and take a few good ones. the Lake is 70 miles long and as wide as 40 miles wide, it is only 15 feet at it's deepest point and the amount of salt in the lake makes it impossible to drown, too buoyant to sink.More pics coming as we take them. The snow filled mountain backdrop and the nearby Salt Lake make this place and amazing venue to visit. Downtown SLC is a very clean and quaint city with lots of History and some really nice things to see and do 

SLC Tonight! Very Nice

The long day started at 415 am as we departed Oxnard for our destination ...Salt Lake City,Ut. ,arriving after many stops and breaks in the trip for Gas, p breaks and just stopping to stretch the legs we arrived exactly 12 hours after we departed. Checked into a really nice Hampton Inn and were greeted with Hot coffee and great cookies at the counter, even received a call from the front desk asking if everything was ok  and to our satisfaction, of course, hell yes , a very clean room and a nice part of downtown SLC. Only 33 miles from Tooele where the world class race track resides. We have 7 races total and a plethora of events from different classes and bike sizes, to include qualifying and practice sessions! So we are tuckered out and really tired  after our pizza order from a local haunt that delivered to our room with salad and a 2 litre of Diet Soda...fucking incredible food and may have eaten one too many pieces of ZZZZA when I should have had 2 ,I had 3. Took a day off from the gym and was going to use the little gym they have here t the Hotel but don't have the energy and have gone 21 days without a break from the gym so tomorrow I will hit it before we leave for the track in the morning. Terria is a trouper as usual, driving at least half the stint and allowing me to close my eyes and alternate after 2-3 hour turns and it really worked out great. Funny how our boy Ty is attending a funeral in nearby Montana and about 2 1/2 hours away from us with his girlfriend and her family.  He was actually in Salt Lake Today earlier dropping a car car off at the airport here in town,funny how that works? Awaiting the shower after Terria cleans up and will get clothes ready for tomorrow, don't know what the weather will bring, 20-30% chance of rain but tomorrow is the least important day of the 3, not much racing just qualifying and some practice sessions, so it's whatever the racing is secondary to hanging out with Terria and building upon the most incredible relationship a man could ever hope for, so much communication and so much honesty and sharing of thoughts and emotions. The true cornerstones of a relationship are worked on daily and sharing the good ,bad and the ugly is part of the deal, not all roses ,but it's all real and we deal in our realities so very well . I am so very blessed, good news from home , mom coming home from rehab on Sunday, spoke to her tonight and she seems so ready to come home and start to enjoy her new knee, not unlike me and my nearly new 2011 refurb job of my knee. Can't complain about anything and won't, I'm glad we brought our laptops so that I can write and that TErria can communicate with our boy and hope to hear from him soon, apparently on mission as we speak so we think happy , positive thoughts and keep plugging along. This Blog has allowed me to do what I need to do in respects o opening up the doors of communicating with myself, sharing my thoughts and inner demons here allows me a good base and the awareness to find the flaws and see and hear myself falling into patterns which Michael calls ,suppression, and self medicating by self sabotage, I get it more so now and can recognize the patterns and feelings of abandonment eve if for only a few hours, I can now see the light at tunnels end and will strive for the successes that have been mine and for those that are at my fingertips! Tomorrow I do it all over again, with my terria at my side to share her wealth of love, knowledge and understanding in this flawed man who knows too much, thinks too much and suppresses too much at times, but I am getting better ad i feel really good about that! Good Times.. Good Night ,really exhausted and the shower is now free

Ready for Utah!

Closing down on my workweek and ready for my trip to SLC to watch superbike racing at its finest and fastest in the world! Terria and i will be departing the Nard at 3 am Friday morning and have a 12 hour drive and good time awaiting us. staying at a nice Hampton inn i believe and have a 25-30 drive to Toeele where the racetrack resides. We have races and Qualifying on Saturday and more racing on Saturday with monday bring the world superbike guys to do their thing. we depart Utah Monday night and head homewards in no hurry, we go back to work on Wednesday and will probably stop in Vegas for dinner, if not we can always make it ot Crazy Ottos in Lancaster for some good ol fashioned eats!! So tonight I will plot out some places to eat and visit in SLC, hiway 15 the entire way and then lodge in North SLC!  Wasa little worried that the new computer ibought caught what i thought was a severe virus, turned out to be a worm and a simple fix and a $95 service charge and all is good, went to eat breakfast at the Gallopin Hen and then even stopped off at the supercuts and got a really good haircut for my trip. So here i am at the front desk playing world ugliest secretary and yet providing World class customer service to my people! Trust me , my shit is world class and nobody can touch me on this or even attempt to dispute this self proclaimed lead in the industry...lmao!! Have to head to the gym, then to therapy with Michael and a qucik visit with my Mom, who gets out of the therapy on Sunday... Good times there! Not sure f I'm taking my laptop on the trip, would love to post picturesof my trip  but we shall see if the computer gets packed...until later cannot wait to spend the next 4 plus days with my incredible Terria and converse and share love that only grows every day

Blessed Realities!

I see the world in a different light
the positives may shine too bright
the fighting and the disarray
never seem to come my way????

Why am I so blessed like few others
My family, my love and my beliefs
the wife of mine, my one in a million
scratch my head and wonder how

I am who i am and what i am
don't always like what I've become
I see the mirrors reflection at times
and look away and try to run

Suppression and running amok
working hard to get it done
seeing beyond yesterdays bad choices
listening to re-assuring voices

when the sun goes down i hold my head up high
tomorrows bring about another fight
I seek out to destroy my fears
feeling older than my actual years

My body aches and my head does spin
my thoughts run rampant as suppression sets in
I'm told to feel and not to think
the hardest thing I've ever tried

Cerebral minds never stop
hearts that bleed will eventually cease
I live my life to forever improve
who i am , what i am and how I do it all

Today i read the daily news
Too real and hurtful but still true
this daydream society that we live in now
ill prepared to persevere

So I remember the bannered words upon the wall
The golden rule that stared at me
I hear Frank Schaeffer tell me so
I Try , I give , I love this life

Something In The Air

I don't know what the hell happened to me today, the day is just a piece of crap and i feel like ending it all right now..the day that is. Starting at 7 am my therapy with Michael went well and helped close the gap on some of my personal issues which sat times get tiring if not old and lame  at the same time. Venture into work and only a few of my trusty co-workers decided to show up so I'm stuck up front and cannot do the needed inspection that i promised and makes me and the office look like clogs, my girls in the office were to do this on Friday but somehow didn't do, or we could have done it today but nobody was here so I can't leave the office. Very frustrating indeed but it's work and not life as we know it, that's another story altogether and has  much deeper reprocutions to it all. so here I am at work , not feeling it at all, feeling like what the fuck is going on today, get the customary text from terria and she feels the same, what the hell, get the call from Ty who is moving out of his apartment and moving to Missouri with his Girlfriend...What the fuck is going on here I swear...really What? Haven't heard from Braz in a few days so of course we worry about him over in the desert and know there is nothing we can do when duty calls! So many little things going on right now, eye appts, Orthopedic Appts, Dental Appts and the fact that Mom is still in the rehab center which is located in a rest home, maybe a few more days and she will be released to come home and get back to normal, funny how I've been to visit her everyday and could go months without seeing her when she is at home. The day is nearing it's end , have an ortho appt to finalize the knee and all is feeling well and able to essentially do whatever I  want with it. It will all settle down i know just dealing with a little more than we are used to but are resilient and will get through the overabundance of stuff going on right now!!!! We live for another day and know the best days are yet to come. On a side not, all you retarded mother fuckers who truly thought the end of the world was upon us because some dickhead said so...got one thing to say to you all! Stupid Assholes. Live another day and accept the fact that the big man decides the Rapture, not the Old man!

Just Letting the Mind Race A little

Been thinking about reading one of 8 new books I have sitting in front of me right now, but the lack of interest in reading is really astounding to me at this point in time. I go through stages where I love to read and then  the stop sign of non reading stamps on my forehead. Eventually I will start reading these books again, especially since I just got Frank Schaeffer's new book today and really don't want to finish it and then have to wait  another year for his next book to come out and be totally dazzled again. Either way a very calm and quiet Saturday afternoon, Gym and breakfast done and done now I ready for my niece Karina's 25th Birthday at the Victoria Pub in Ventura and get to hang out with the Lyons klan and definitely not going to be a quiet evening, these folks are as loud as I and I really look forward to hanging with the boys and the nieces as well. I do need to get ready and stop running around in my skivvies and prepare myself, or at least get dressed and ready to leave. Hope to start writing more here again and have convinced myself to start writing poetry again in my hand journal, I really love to write poetry  and or song writing and get back into the swing of the mindset that is required to write that style of writings. Anyway the mind is still running rampant and I do what I do ,how I do it when I do and that's all I know how to do. Be it odd or unorthodox, it's what I do and the mind race is an ongoing issue with me. I cannot simplify my thoughts and life as it seems that I would be limiting myself by slowing it all down and thus not being me, the free flowing , thought provoking fool who at times allows his mind to get i the way of rational and free flowing thoughts by not thinking too much. Whatever the case may be,I will figure it out before it engulfs me and this I know to be true. Look forward to a nice Ducati run somewhere tomorrow, see how the weather hold up, todays it beautiful , tomorrow it could be different. Good ?Times and I'm off to the changing room to put on my big boy Pants

Weird Day!

A little bit of a different day today, started off at 530 am showered and met a friend from work at Ihop for breakfast. He showed up 25 minutes late and when he did arrive we enjoyed some good stories and laughs as we always do. He is out of work and bought me breakfast which pissed me off but I wasn't going to argue with the guy about, very Nice of him. I get to work and we have interviews going on in the office and the traffic is larger than normal as a result. I was treated to breakfast, treated to a lunch which I didn't eat, fried chicken which is too greasy for my abdomen these days , so i boiled me a few Hebrew nationals and ate before I headed out to the driving range to work on the old golf swing, all went well and feeling really good about my swing and the solid contact that I am making. I am foregoing the gym tonight and heading to the rehab center to see my mother who is rehabilitating her new titanium knee and hopefully will get to come home sooner than later, that place really creeps me out and the day of the living dead comes to mind when I visit this place, the sights ,sounds and smells are repulsive and I can only ask God to take me long before i get to that stage of diminished condition..please.  My mom is the spring chicken in this place and this is a rehab home  which also houses long termers as well. So i will head straight from work and visit my mom and meet my wife and the house for whatever we decide for dinner??? The light rains we had was much more than i though so an evening motorcycle ride wouldn't be a good idea with not so perfect roads around the lake front. Less than an hour and a half to go and the day has really flown by for me, even though it was an early riser for me today it feels like just hours ago i was having breakfast and now the downhill side of the day is upon us. I really need to catch up on the 6 books i ordered and haven't really read in a week or so! Funny how the reading comes and goes for me, i read 3 books in 10 days a few weeks ago now can't fathom reading anything as I am somewhat disinterested , even with some really good books to read! It will all come back to me and get back into the swing of it and further educate this complex mind of mine...Fuck, being smart just means the headaches are larger and the dumb people just keep getting dumber.   Well enough for the Sarcasm , time to pretend I'm doing something here at the workplace....shit, As If???

Sniff'n the Tears - Driver's Seat 1978

Another Lost Gem

Ian Gomm - Hold On (To What You've Got) TROS Rock Planet 1978

This song speaks many loud and truthful volumes in the grand scheme of our lives! An old favorite but a constant reminder that newer is not always better, it's just newer is all!!

Monday Morning Clarity

A really uneventful weekend for sure, Friday had dinner with Shawn form North Carolina and plan on having breakfast with him today before he leaves tomorrow! Terria and i spent most of the weekend relaxing and at the Gym together, this is what we do and are gearing up for our Salt Lake city trip to watch the motorcycle races at the highest level of racing! I reflect back at times hoping to come up with reasons or even excuses for past mistakes, it doesn't come freely but it consumes me at times and then I catch myself and say"let it be" , let it go and move forward as we have in our lives. I remember thinking about how I didn't want to write on this site anymore and start writing in my own personal journal. Then i thought to myself, i hate writing , I hate physically writing anyway and told myself that this site is mine to use and journal how I feel so i continue to use this as my springboard to mental awareness about myself and those around me! When I feel good or bad about something is when I write the most, doing well seems to bring about a different type of writing than when i feel angry or ill at ease with something going on. for the most part I'm always positive and more so always realistic in my thoughts and convictions about people and the expectations that most people are good and that the rest are as fucked up as can be and need to be avoided at all costs. But being the eternal optimist can at times get me to raise the expectation levels and thus be disappointed when people don't step up or do what they say they are going to do, trying to be compassionate of others lives and toils I see the light at the end of the tunnel , and am always willing to meet people half way in that tunnel. I see allot of things and hear allot of things that people spew off as real to them, trying to convince themselves that the world is the way they see it and that can be the furthest from the truth. Expect the unexpected and hope for the best but expect the worst. I pride myself on never being too high or too low emotionally, for some reason people call it suppression, i call it surviving myself and thriving to live another day when today doesn't go as planned. Sometimes picking our battles and choosing our wars is self sustaining and mentally it allows me to be strong as i need to be and the end game and goal are always directed at happiness. Happiness is never found in another, nor is it ever found in possessions or things that we own or buy, it is nice to have "Stuff" and Do "Stuff" but are meaningless if there is no love in our lives and we reach out and nobody is there to give back what we unceremoniously give to those we say we love. Love is very Fickle and very vicious and it can create the best of times and the very worst in times if we allow ourselves to be blind sided with Love and the way we interpret it all. I have grown personally so much over the past few years, by allowing myself to believe that I'm not always right and that i can be allowed to be loved and give of myself and allow to be given back all that I give, Love is listening and hearing what is said, Love is also feeling the pains of others and sympathizing and empathizing with others  plight. Being where I'm at with Terria has allowed me to live a drama free ,love filled existance that has never wavered...ever, so much understanding through communication and listening to what we each have to share on a daily and nightly basis, It's never been what we have or where we go that matters, it's what we do together and how we appreciate each and every moment with each other that truly matters. The kid being grown doesn't stop us from being parents, we will always be there for our kids, but it allows us to focus more on the next 25 years and to plan for the things that we as older adults must plan for. I look back only to look ahead at times and feel the pains of the past and feel the disappointments but only for a brief moment. I pray for very little gains in my life, i do pray for peace and the ability to be a better person to all, i pray for the safety of our kids and our troops over seas , I God can take this all away today by sickness or loss of employment and I'd be a very blessed man to have the family that I have ,with or without the things I own. So very blessed with the AMAZING Wife Terria that I cherish and adore to no end and the life and lifestyle that we are blessed to have, but most of all the love Of God and the Love of family is the best gift we have ever received. I hold it , cherish it and won't ever want this to go away, so i do my part by gripping tighter and holding on to what I've got, which is an Ian Gomm song that i will post and has always been a favorite of mine. for the family and friends that I do have, i appreciate and admire you all, the fact that i am alive and well is the best gift that i can share with the world. Blessed is the person who loves our God and lives a "GOLDEN RULE" lifestyle, not the person who yells the loudest that they Do!!!!! Good  times Indeed!

A Good Friday!

I have apparently lost a few of my blog posts here for some reason, don't know how or why but gone nonethelesss??? It is Friday morning and the office is running less than half staff, the usual suspects are not here today and all are not too shocked at that proposition. Amazing to me how people abuse their jobs and the fact that they still have a job is a miracle on 34th street in itself. People are somewhat retarded at times, had an officer come in applying for housing this morning, said he spoke to somebody, he didn't know who, when asked what house he was offered he said he didn't know or couldn't remember. an officer mind you without the wherewithall to ask the right questions or document pertinant information comes in and expects us to do the lkefg work to cover for his ineptitude. I'm like, what the fuck ever anymore with lame ass people these days...see republican party tea Bagger for a better exampe of this..good christ idiots are brewing ever nearer. Still somewhat puzzled where my lost posts went and why they disappeared? This weekend is almost upon us and a motorcycle ride is in order , a weekend dinner with my friend Shawn from NC is also on tap for this weekend. Terria i think has her 5th golf lesson and thats all I have going this weekend. Mom gets moved into the rest home today to start her rehab for her knee replacement and hope that  goes weel so she can get back home to friendly quarters, We I'm here at front solo right now, thinking about all the things i wan tto do for lunch or for after work and meanwhile drawing blanks in my mind, not too often does that happen to me but it even happens to me when the blonde moments come more frequently these days and the recovery is rapid but going there hurts at times because I don't like stupid shit in my life. anyway, the day is half over and I'm all alone in the office as i speak, where everybody is ???? don't know, maybe off getting micro chipped by the Govt or some shit. All is well, look forward to days end! Good Times!

A Good Day!

Another incredible day here in the Nard, back to work and doing very little today. Really hungry this morning and trying to sneak away for a breakfast of some sorts somewhere ,somehow. Our trip , or our anniversary trip is planned. We head to Chicago on July 15th , have a game at Wrigley o Saturday and then drive to Detroit for a 4 hour jaunt to the motor city to watch the Tigers at comerica park. After the game we head to Food networks Iron Chef Michael Symons "Roast " restaraunt for a nice semi elogant dinner at his  restaraunt which is .4 miles from the ballpark. After that we will head back to Chicago stopping in Ann arbor to visit University of Michigan and then run towards Sout Bend to visit Notre Dame U and al of that incredible history there. Robert Nevarez is actually more excited than we are and asked that we bring him something back form his favorite college in the world.We will then visit the city of Indianapolis and if time allows drive up to milawaukee to see Lambeau field,other than that not much to see in Milwaukee. loving my college towns and my UCLA and Notre Dame being my 2 favorite colleges going these days and getting the opportunity to visit them is a great thing for me. Terria is realy excited about our trip, this will mark year # 10 in our marriage and am so damn fortunate to be where I am after all the trials and tribulations that we have been through ove rthe past year or so. Being resilient and loving the relationship that we have by the ongoing work we put in is truly amazing. visiting michael to keep us on track and focused on the big picture of staying strong and being strong for each other, meanwhile working out the bugs that we don't always know exist until a trained professional points them out to us and helps us to recognize that we are all flawed and have a certain amount of issues and baggage that must be honored and ealt with appropriately.  Everything is going as it should and knowing that stagnation is never an option that we press forward in our search for the missing pieces of the puzzle that our early developements may have lacked or need straightening, whatever  the case may be we are doing well and workig hard daily to keep the focus of the big picture ever in our sights. The times are good and the days are full of joy and happiness. Going to the gym after work then headed to the hospital to visit Mom and her new knee so all is well and feeling really good today!

hospital, trips and Anniversary Celebration

At the hospital with my Mom tonight,knee replacement surgery went well and the road to reccovery begins now  Hoping that this will make her quality of life bigger and better and allow her the freedoms to get around pain free! knowing that a second repacement is needed we shall see how this one goes and see if the recovery goes well  another beautiful southern cal day and off from work to be here for family today.   back to work tomorrow and hopefully get to the weekend soon enough. Terria and I booked our Chicago trip for July 15 and will make a drive to Detroit to watch a ballgame on Sunday 17 July after watching a Cub game from wrigley on Saturday. We have dinner reservations at Michael Symons "Roast" restaraunt in downtown Detroit for Sunday after the Tigers game  we will also stop by South Bend to visity Notre dame and Ann arbor to see University of Michigan  after which we will make another drive 3 hours south to indianapolis to see that city and visit the Stadiums and the Indy 500 track  a great way to spend our 10th Anniversary together and a quiuick 5 days to relax in chicago, Detroit and Indy with some cool stops at my 2 favorite Football universitys in the Nation.  so ready for leaving the hosopital ,grab a bite to eat with T and then head home and plan the rest of my evening with absolutely no plans at all  Good times and Great wishes  for my Mommas speedy recovery!

Foster The People - Houdini (Live in Solana Beach)

Another very catchy Foster THe People song! good new sound for me

Foster the People 'Pumped Up Kicks' Live from SXSW

I do like this live version better, different music but still cool enough to be adored by G-Man

Foster The People - Pumped Up Kicks

A new and fresh sound for my palate, me likey lots!!!!

So Much On the Plate

It's Monday morning and all is right in the world today, at least for me this fine day. Feeling better after my stomach flu and almost back to full strength, Terria I'm afraid is a few days behind me in her recovery of the same illness. Last night was a very interesting night for T and I and we talked it through to finality! After a long and essentially uneventful mothers day at April's house, a little louder than i would have wanted but par for the course when people get together. I cooked Chicken, Ribs, Ranchera and sliders on the grill, the food was amazing but my appetite was not all the way back and ate very little. Terria and I were surrounded by Brandon and Ty and were missing our Braz who actually was able to call his mom twice Sunday morning from Afghanistan which made her day and yet gave her an uneasy feeling, Braz not really sounding good and seemingly the realities of his duties have kicked in! Upon getting home we relaxed and I headed to the gym for a 45 minute workout to get back some energy by exerting myself into consciousness, or getting with the program as it were.  I was able to watch my World Superbike races that I had Tivo'd and enjoyed those to great length. Knowing in less than 3 weeks we will be at the races in Salt Lake City to watch the World Superbikes and the American superbikes both in their full splendor live and in person at one of the best tracks in the  World at Miller motorpark in Toele Utah, 20 minutes outside of Utah's Capital city of Salt Lake. We are really looking forward to a great time and a great drive of over 800 miles, i love to drive and love my music while i drive so we will be in a good place come the end of the month! Also looking at either going to Chicago or to Boston for a 4 day quick trip to watch either the Sox or the Cubs in Chicago, have n't really decided yet but want to make a trip either one as being the oldest 2 parks still standing , I'm intrigued by the history of it all and the beauty of the game played in these museums called ballparks. Well, getting back to the overload of emotions which sprung up last night, Saturday marked the 1 year anniversary of Ty's accident over the cliff in Ojai and the fact that we were all in a different mindset last mother's day, things have definitely changed since then and have really re-shaped the face of our existence as we speak today. The fact that Braz is essentially unreachable and we wait for him to contact us is really hard, knowing that for the next 15 months we sit back a wait to hear from him whenever we can. So  much pressure put on a 19 year old kid with a wife and a career and not yet living his childhood, as a parent sometimes very discouraging when they want to grow up so quickly and then realize that playing grown up is not all it's cracked up to be when the laws of averages and rules of life take over and seemingly aren't that fair. But as parents we let our kids grow as they must knowing there are times when we wash out hands of the blame and pains that we feel of our mistakes and shortcomings. We have to let the kids evolve, when they don't listen to you anyway , we must still keep preaching, as they grow up and grow older the words of wisdom we give have more and more meaning to them as they understand what we try to teach, but it's in their own time and speed that this occurs. Growing up for me was never a rapid accent, I stayed forever in the depths of childhood and i continue to enjoy my youth even at the age of 48, forever young or so i think anyway!!!! Yeah all seems to be headed in the right direction, we have 15 months of uncertainty and then we really find out what Brandon wants to do with his education and training , as for Ty boy , he's the wildcard and changes with the wind but hopefully he grows up quicker than he has so far and pulls it all together, whatever happens we are bonded tight and strong and know that each is right there side by side to help us along in our trek of uncertainty and times of emptiness, we will survive this and we will get through it all in flying Greg and Terria fashion, by communicating and sharing the thoughts and feelings when they occur, this is the daily ritual that we share and this is how we get stronger everyday and will continue the trend of doing it right and getting shit done.  A very fruitful and prosperous future awaits us and the present aint so bad either, loving life and loving my family to it's fullest , getting better each and every day and always looking for ways to get better. Happy Mondays to all and Good times are here and await our tomorrow!

Down and Out, but coming Back!

Feeling really good in comparison to a few days ago, the stomach virus that plagued my body is going away slowly, but surely! Feel good today and know that i must relax and possibly take another Day off from the gym, strength not being all the way back I must rest maybe one more day! As for Terria, the gift of giving was just that, i gave her my dreaded bug and now she fights the aches and pains that i went through but thankfullynot as severe which is a good sign. Not having been sick for 2 years I assumed that the initial sickness would be a big one and well ,I was right!!!! Today i came in on an off day to make up for a day i will take next week for my mothers Knee replacement surgery which she has put off as long as i had my knee surgery. The weekend is going to be a  tranquil one , Terria and I were going to host the fight this weekend but with all the work getting the house ready and the cooking and cleaning of the event we figure we don't have the energy to do it at this time and apologized to the invitees and they all understood. I'm her at work today feeling  a Little blue, knowing my wife is not 100% well and it was because of me. The day of past have are but a glimmer in the rear view and I wonder at times how i put myself there, but realistically finding my way and looking forward to the day in front of me, so much pain and drama in the world and i sometimes feel like a major contributor, when i do look back to this time last year , especially May 3 which was the day i told Terria i was seeing another woman I can't even fathom being that person, for what reasons and what possibly could i be looking for and looking forward to with another person that i know nothing about. The honeymoon phase is easy for everybody and the fun and games are cool, but when you throw a perfectly functioning marriage away for the sake of "WHAT" to try something different is so appalling to me, i get the reasons she did what she  but for me to take that jump was so out of character for me and so not Greg Duran. Yes looking back only makes the future that much better, living and learning more about myself and what really makes this life so important. It's never about Me but more about Us and those around me that matter the most, the very small friend pool that we share and the tight knit family that we are is the most important thing going in our lives. The faith in God to try to be the best person possible and live that "Golden Rule " life that i stress so much and is so important to me! I wish all mothers Happy mothers Day, although the day is a joke as is Valentines Days and all of the other Romaticist bullshit Hallmark created reasons to go commercial on the world. Getting back to basics and showing the people that matter in your life that they do matter, not once a year when society deems it a holiday to do so... Good Times!

So much going on today!

So much has happened over the last 24 hours in the world and I guess we shall wait and see what becomes of this phenomena in Terrorist land around the world, we got the guy we wanted and yet we still fight the same fight in the same hills and only have a symbolic victory to show for it. While thousands of soldiers are in harms flight to include my boy Braz and his wife Nikki, i only think of the hell they face over the next 12-18 months in Jalalabad Dog shit hell as Terria made them cookies and sent Nikki her Care package for her 20th birthday. Life is well but other than this damn stomach virus that i have going here I am really out of sorts with sleep and eating and the general axis of my world has been temporarily off kilter. The gym and golf have been put to rest , no motorcycle this past weekends beautiful 77 degree weather and it did put Terria in familiar grounds of fending for me as she does so well, thanks again O' wife O mine. It did bring back flash backs of the accident as the pains and weakness were very similar, with the exception of being able to use the restroom by myself the rest felt near the same  and the nightly delirium of fevers added a new twist to it all. But looking forward I feel better, not 100% but getting better this time knowing that there won't be hemoglobin #'s to be looked at, just trying to stay hydrated today and get through my dental appt to try to re-attach my fallen crown at 11:15 this morning. Tonight, if I make it through this workday will consist of a hot shower and a warm blanket and rest rest rest. Terria has been so amazing and last night as we went to sleep at 11pm , i dosed off with the help of Excedrin PM's  woke up and noticed she wasn't there , she went in to watch Army wives as she was wide awake, so i joined her and sensed an uneasiness about her mood. Knowing that we got Bin Laden is only going to make things more treacherous for Braz out there in the field for the next year plus, she's smart enough to know tat and shared that fear with me, i agreed and said wait for more shit to happen because it will! Be hope and pray for all of the troops to be safe, knowing that losing just 1 is 1 too many, a war that should not have ever started is just that, dust in the wind and we can't do anything about it. I am proud to have our Boy in the Army and serving our country proudly, and knowing that Brandon wants to join in a years time as well also makes me fearful but equally as proud to know that my boys aren't afraid to work and fight  for a living, it;'s not for everyone. I for one could never be yelled at or kiss anybody's ass they way they are trained to do. So i will close with a thought of prosperity and positivity. all we can do is be ourselves, all we are, is who we are and as long as we live by the Golden rule and touch people in a positive way, Republican,Democrat , atheist or Christian we are all created equally and make the choice to disenfranchise our gifts ,or we cash in and share them with the world. Life is about choices and the accountability for those choices. I own mine, hope you all own yours too!!!!!!

Been Sicker than a Dog

A serious bout of stomach flu and fevers have kept me grounded since Wednesday night and feel allot better tonight as I prepare for a workweek and a dentist appt in the morning. Damn run down and never been this sick since November -22 2009, as per usual my Terria is by my side and assisting and fighting with me to relax, so I listen and have not been to the gym for 4 days or really out of the house for 4 plus days, sav3 for a drive around the lake with Terria to get me some sunshine. Happy days and so glad we got Bin Laden and now push forward and further close their doors down...hell yes