Private Writing...or Not?

After a rough night last night and the ongoing distrust that I've created since last March time frame I'm going to pull the plug on my writing on this site. I know that Terria will be disappointed but in my honest opinion i have put my thoughts out to the world for too long now and truly feel like i have no privacy, required to answer what i was thinking or said is not my idea of free writing so i need to move onto  writing the old fashioned way where my thoughts are my own and i won't ever need to explain anything ever again. Yeah I'm a fuck up and yeah I'm as ass at times but I am who i am and that's all i can be. I say what i want when I want and that will never change, over the course of my shit spewing dialogue i always seem to piss somebody off and i don't need to justify shit to anybody anymore so i move back to a more familiar arena of writing which is very important to me. Being as selfish as i am i understand that i take away a pleasure of Terrias and i do not like that aspect of it all but the main focus of my writing is  for me, and for that I will never apologize since I've been writing for over 30 years seriously and able to explore myself through my writings. Today is another day in the life of Greg and still have yet to be fully accepted as the way i a and the ways of me are never conventional and I cannot change that nor do i ever want to. i do want to become a better person and a better husband but the old adage of making chicken salad out of chicken shit is probably closer to the truth. I fell no depression or anger just a little disappointed at the turn of events that make me turn to another avenue for coverage of my emotions. Terria has been nothing but incredible throughout the past year and I feel that I need to regain a little space for myself through my writing and express myself better when I'm alone in my own world of thoughts. I have been able to produce 2 books of my writings which i proudly display on my coffee table or on some dusty shelf somewhere, regardless my stupid ass is tired of looking back and hurting over and over again for all of my shortcomings so moving on to pen and paper might give me the strength and freedom to really unload  but we shall see, don't honestly know that i am committed to that either, i hate writing manually , my penmanship has become horrible and i know this to be true so we shall see, maybe more reading will quench my thirst and let somebody else write for a change . who knows! good times, good day!