Here at work this morning and feeling a little inspired to write a little something about nothing at all. I truly enjoy the dynamics of the personalities here at work, the dysfunction junction as i like to call it and I sit back and interject in my minds eye how truly fucked up people are. Living my life the way I do, my mind, body and emotions always firing on full blast I wonder at times how we function as a species. The time I spend here at work helps me to realize how odd i am or maybe how truly odd the rest are, either way I love where I'm at and my rationalization and underdstanding on what makes happiness seems to differ from what the masses seem to gravitate towards. I get the wants and needs and desiring of things we want versus need, things and possessions are the root of so much of what is wrong with us as a species. Being very blessed and so very fortunate to have more than enough and happy in the search for other things to quench life's palate of things and crap and all that really doesn't matter in the grand scheme of life...yet we want and seek out the things we don't need. human nature does some shitty things to us all, i find myself really wanting another motorcycle, a newer house, a new Baseball glove but things are just that...things, the truth of the matter is that I want because I want and can have because I can. In simple terms I folow along with the masses in my outward desires for things needed versus wanted and fight the fight on a daily basis, I realize and can seperate the two and do so on a daily basis with my constant flow of thinking aloud at times about things and stuff that really don't matter. Thankfully my mind and heart are substantial and plentiful in the giving aspect of what I do on a daily ritualistic basis. Trying to be good and kind and understanding of others is a point I adhere to at Nauseum sometimes but try to be the bigger person and listen to another regurgiated story of woe by coworkers and friends alike. It's all good because it is, I can't complain too much because I'm not that guy, I may bitch and moan about insignificant things but deal wit the omportant things in a kick ass manner, life is very important and i trwat it as such but with a smile and lots of laughter and sarcasm to boot. I won't be serious for too long because it drains and it's not where I wan t6to spend the majority of my time , my life and efforts to continue my happiness.
Speaking of happiness my Baby girl Aubrey is so damn Amazing and it's been 2 days since I saw her and i miss her so much, momma a dad need to bring her by real soon or I will break! Being a new Grandpa is the best thing that's happened in a long time, bringing a new life of love and perspective to our lives, Terria is an amazing grandmother as she is a wife and mother, just seems to be the perfect thing and the perfect timing for us to have this little girl come into our world. she is so much about Love and being loved and will never ever lack that from us trust me, there is a special feel and bond that we have towards her knowing that mom and dad probably won't together foirever, too young and selfish to work o their issues and hoping that this baby aubrey does not suffer the consequences of their innabilities. We stand back with guarded hearts to thik that this little baby could be out of state in a manner of moments if aother fight ensues with her parents and they break up for the 12th time. This instability worries me a bit but we will love this baby with everything we have as long as she is within arms reach and available for us to be a positive influence. So much goodness in this baby and so much potential for drama at the same time no fault of her own. But we will enjoy her every second we can, Ty going away in august to boot camp and now we have 2 in the miloitary and worries are doubled but they grow up and move away eventually and we are ok with that fact ,just being selfish and knowing our baby Aubrey will be taken away from us soon.
So I defer to Terria in this forum to help me decide on the trip to Portland for a Donut, yes Voodoo donuts in Portland is calling our name but the rational side of me says driving 960 miles one way for a donut, spending a few hours in a cool city and driving back the following day is a little mind boggling but we roll in that directin and the therapeutic effects are always worth the drive, I love to drive and converse with my Terria about our lives and things that I mentioned here earlier and just the tranquility of my company, the road ,the music and the thoughts of being spontaneous and free from stupid worries about bills and payemts and traffic and mean people, our own little world takes us away from that mess and keeps us where we are in that happy place, seemingly unreal, but so very true and real and it's my life to cherish and share with my T and my boys. Love is so priceless and so very hard to find and too damn easy to lose. hold it, cherish it and never let it go away because time naturally will do it for us all
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