Heading towards the 4th of July with nothing planned and nothing really on the horizon. The workweek is cut in half and will return on Thursday and Friday to end it all. Really have nothing planned, will BBQ some dead animals and thats about it, have a few diet pepsi's and some mother earth food to keep it as healthy as possible. Let's see where I'm at these days , prepping for the Texas trip and a few ballgames in Arlington and one in Houston which should be cool in itself. Want to try to see the famed Astrodome before they tear it down and maybe the NASA Space center while driving through. One of my main objectives while in Dallas is to see Dealey Plaza and see the spot of the JFK assassination as this part of history and the coverup really plagues my thoughts of this country,along with the 9-11 Bullshit story from Mr. Bush,but that's a different book altogether. Should be really Hot in texas at the end of July but we are ready for it and it's whatever as far as I'm concerned. We did enjoy the turnaround trip to Vegas this past weekend to see the Penn and Teller show at the Rio, drove home immediately after the show and a quick 5 hour drive brought us back to the Nard at 4 am so all in al a very good, quick ,safe trip. The anticipation of the drive to Texas is really exciting to me, i love to drive and really enjoy having my co-pilot listen to music with me as we drive, carrying a conversation about our lives and where we have been and where we want to go from here is always the best part of the trips we take. But before all of that i have a chore and a task to try to complete before we leave.
The task of removing and replacing my front lawn is haunting me as I speak, really want to get it ship shape and get back my old sparkling lawn to it's old self again. Always had a great lawn but gophers took over and destroyed it, I have plans to implant devices which are said to keep them away and will hope that they do their job! So my next set of choices are the following, do i pull, level and re-seed or do I level, clear, amend the soil and buy the Sod new and start over fresh and new with totally perfect instantly spectacular lawn?? And if so which Marathon Sod do i pick, there are over 20 types of Sod and 4 types of Marathon in itself, so the decisions won't be easy on any front and I will decide by this weekend which mode of resurrection I will take.
On the personal front Terria and I move onward each and everyday towards bigger and better things together and with our kids and immediate families, the days of the past are used to remind where we have been and that we can't dwell on all of that but proceed on with the goodness and the hard work we have put in to put us in a greater place than ever before. Input equals output i life and in everything we do so the hard work has definitely paid dividends on the personal front, we still have work to do and time to work on becoming even better, stagnation is never a place we want to be ever again and no fault of hers but in my mind i became that satisfied, stop trying to get better person in our marriage and essentially content with the way things were, which in relationships is the death serum for sure. We have moved on without the services of Michael Morales, not by choice but he has since retired as of May 31,2012 and has left us the opportunity to call him off line if needed, or as long as he stays in the country, something about him going back to Paris to live might take him away from us forever, we shall see. I do miss him in sense, but in a way think that there was an opportunity for Terria to sink or swim in where we are in life, so far all afloat and doing incredibly well. I have forgiven myself for my departure to my marriage and have built upon my strengths with her and we have tried so hard to forget the past but always somehow use it to propel us to newer heights and appreciation of the woman I almost let out of my life. I have forgiven myself as has Terria but won't ever forget the place in my life and in my mind the how and why of what I did to my wife and family, I can only look and thank Terrias Strengths and the reason that we are where we are, I made some serious life realizations through her strengths that enabled me through counseling to see the light of day and go through everyday with a better understanding of the type of person i was, am and want to continue to grow to be. So very thankful to God and all of the Family and Friends who never turned their backs not only on me , but Terria, so much love and support from both my family and her Sister and her Family, the rest, to include her mother can go Fuck themselves for their lack of support for Terria for something that I did to her and had no effect on the relationship between Terria and them, they can hate me for what i did but not Terria who was the victim here and got no support from her mother or Brother, but thankfully my family(most of my family, minus Linda,all bark no bite and a paper Christian, yeah i said it and I'm over it, fuck her too) and her sister Brazaleen and the kids stepped it up and gave her the love she deserved, for that i will be eternally grateful and will never forget. So back to my not so busy workday and lack of schedule, will be out of here by 3, off to the gym and home to prep meat for tomorrow. Hope all is awesome in the world today, it is where I see it but not everybody see the world where I sit, Happy and safe 4th!
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