Reading Frank Schaeffer book "Crazy For God"

Just received my book yesterday and have just delved into it a little bit. enough to see that I will enjoy the different perspective on Religion that Mr. Schaeffer so eloquently portrays. I emailed Mr. Schaeffer and he actually returned my email and hoped that I would enjoy his book and asked me to let him know how i liked it or if I had any questions to get in touch with him. As I stated to him I'm not looking to be converted , or to see religion in a different light, I'm just looking for an education on what it is that makes people believe n what they believe and the reasons for that belief? I hope to garner some insight as to how religion is utilized in everyday life without compromising rational and free thinking. so much of what has turned me away from Christianity is being held captive by the guilt and by the thought that every move I make is being scrutinized, or every bad thought is being tallied up for judgement day. I've never been a guy to pray for an outcome ,or a materialistic gain thru a prayer or a wish, but during my christian faith days i would ask for strength to make the right decision, or the ability to give it my best shot , never asking for a particular outcome. I remember before rides of my 180 mph GSXR1000 motorcycle I would say a little passage to myself asking myself to be smart, ride hard, have fun and do whatever it takes to do all of that and get back in one piece, all the while knowing I could and still might die on any given ride, more so at my own doing than a car side swiping me, I ride in desolate canyons where the traffic is sparse and any mistake made will be my own, I'm pretty confident in my abilities as a rider who carries speeds in excess of 160 MPH and top out at 175mph, so an accident at that rate is fatal, no questions asked. Yet it is then that my mortality comes into play, my strengths and weaknesses as a human being are displayed, mere chance and happenstance of making it home alive after doing 120mph into a sweeping turn with knees scraping and telephone poles and guard barriers and gravel 3 feet away. But never prayed to be kept safe. i want to know why even ask a christian back when , i would never ask for anything and have always been so blessed in my personal life, work, family etc. I'm just not understanding how real devout Christians have so many issues and so many things that i don't ever have to deal with. Maybe it is all a state of mind, the fact that I believe that we are the champions of our own happiness and our own misery, knowing I have a say in most of what happens around me and that which is positive i can embrace and that which pulls me down(ie:) a needy friend or negative person I can choose to not be around , thus removing myself from the negative and taking myself back into the world that i can control and prosper. i don't know why I have been so blessed with knowledge, strength, personality, humor, love , admiration from others and a sense of loyalty from those who know my name. I embrace my goodness as part chance, part hard work, and mostly common sense , enough to know that If I want , or don't want or don't like something ,it is within my powers to hold the good and throw away the bad, simple yet the concept is very foreign to a lot of people i know, love and work with. My true sense of realism is my biggest asset i believe, it has allowed me to keep my life in perspective, and to see what is real, what is here instead of what I want , desire and cannot reach without outside help, therefore i essentially have everything I need and most of what i want and in my eyes this makes me a rich person free of needless drama and a set of ideals and beliefs that rival any bible thumping christian without the worthless judgement which generally accompanies the written scripture. I'm open minded and if somebody could show me , teach me , impress upon me that there is a better way to live than i currently do, they will have a monstrous task on their hands. Whether or not i will ever become a christian again will be determined on these factors and not by guilt or fear of reprisals. So I look onward and positively seek out answers to my questions, all of which I know have an answer. I am hoping Frank Schaeffers' book will assist me in doing so.!!!